You are not alone in a partnership, that much is clear. But in order for the ego and you to become a we in which both partners feel real connectedness, more is needed. They are the four levels of a relationship, that give depth to the partnership. As an expert, Dr. Ralph Piotroswki from praxis-paartherapie.berlin what really matters in a relationship.
I – the individual level
Our society emphasizes the very strong individualism, Not entirely wrong, because in a relationship it is important not to lose sight of yourself and ask yourself again and again which needs you have.
Besides, every human has very own personality traits, In an equal partnership, everyone contributes to what makes him or her. However, those who only look at the ego will be confronted with challenges in their romantic relationship, such as the allegation of the partner that one has no common interests or too little time for each other.
I + you – perceive the others
Who is solidified as a personality, can see his counterpart as it really is. And that is that Basic requirement for finding each other as a couple, This second level is about taking responsibility for the other and find out what he needs,
The five languages of love are a playful way to do so. Conflicts always occur where the other is feels stunnedbecause he does not experience empathy and differences are not accepted.
We – deny everyday life together
As a couple you are together instead of lonely. This is an incredibly valuable insight that the Everyday test as We but still has to exist. In the rut of the everyday one must common routine to be found first.
Conflicts lurk where unspoken expectations Become walls, for example, if a partner has the feeling of throwing the household completely alone. Although too many others interfere in the intimate relationship or the couple is completely shut off from the world, that is Quarrel often inevitable in the long run, If the fronts are already hardened, one can Therapy with a couple therapist show new ways.
Environment – the world in its entirety
As individuals as well as a couple one is not alone, one is Part of his environment and embedded in a circle of friends as well as a family, social and professional environment. The environment is therefore the fourth level of relationships.
On the one hand, it is exciting to find out how the partner moves in his environment. On the other hand, often meet here as well different views on topics such as politics, culture or spirituality each other. Here, it is important to find a common ground and use the four levels to to grow together as a couple,